The Podium
Disgruntled is not the word I'd use
As always, I'll try to weed out the duplicates, I may succeed, but it's a pretty long list.
1. Back up your opinions. If you don't, you'll sound like an arrogant jackass.
2. I learned basic wiring in a house.
3. Too much time is spent on trying to be politically correct.
4. Take time for yourself once in a while.
5. Trees suck.
6. Hot tubs + poison oak = not good. The chemicals don't kill it but rather spread it to your whole body and give it to whomever is in the hot tub with you.
7. Don't hang your punching bag up in the garage next to your mother's brand new BMW. The bag might fall and the chains will dent and scratch the car.
8. I spend a lot of money on useless crap.
9. TR is always right.
10. Start a Roth IRA as soon as you can.11. Don't chew tobacco on campus.
12. Getting into fights with 14 year olds is not good even if they assault you first.
13. Girls are not to be trusted. Even if they give good head!
14. Economics can be a lot of fun.
15. Appearances are not everything. TR may be bald, fat, and grumpy, but he is also funny, smart, and makes learning worthwhile.
16. Never argue with a cop with you are doing something illegal.
17. If your knee joints, hip bones, or any other bones are out of place you should get them aligned because it can cause arthritis when you are older.
18. If you don't floss your teeth on a regular basis and use flouride you'll get gingivities, which leads to gum disease.
19. Don't worry too much. Worrying about things that aren't life threatening is a waste of time.
20. Don't speed at night. Traffic school was the most boring eight hours of my life.21. Fitness personal trainers are a waste of time and money.
22. Never buy a Sony Ericsson T616 cell phone. The buttons are crap and so are the pictures.
23. Always have fun, even in the worst situations there's still a bright side.
24. Not to worry too much about mistakes, the world still goes on.
25. I learned how drugs can really screw up a person's life.
26. Class was pretty pointless. Not always, but sometimes it felt like a waste of time.
27. Work hard, play harder.
28. How to cook better.
29. Family is everything.
30. Move on, and it's ok to be mean.31. It is ok to be alone.
32. You can't always trust people.
33. Appreciate the surroundings you're in.
34. Get along with your parents.
35. Love those you love and let them know you love them.
36. I have learned to be happy.
37. I have learned to be honest.
38. Don't freeload off society.
39. Most things learned in class will never be used in real life scenarios.
40. How to critically think.41. Life isn't fair, get used to it.
42. All the "red tape" you have to cross is set up by public officials.
43. Working harder is not always the best way to get things done.
44. The better something tastes the more likely it is bad for you.
45. You can't drink a gallon of milk in a half hour and not puke.
46. Being a TA is the best class.
47. Being a Senior isn't like being a king.
48. Trees are evil.
49. Plaid is the best pattern for a material and everyone should wear flannel.
50. Common sense is a good thing.51. Don't procrasinate.
52. You have to take what life gives you and roll with the punches.
53. How to eat discreetely so if an administrator comes in TR has "plausible deniability."
54. Hooters has good chicken wings.
55. If your clothes are too tight you should buy new clothes because people are cranky when their clothes are too tight.
56. Lumberjacks are cool and trees suck. Oh my God I've been brainwashed.
57. TR with a wig would be the best prom queen ever.
58. In class it has to stay in class. We can only make fun of people in the class.
59. TR's class is the only class I didn't want to miss.
60. The importance of having an opinion that I can defend.61. BSing is a skill that everyone uses and should be good at.
62. Keeping a budget is important.
63. Sports Illustrated has a lot of interesting covers and when you get bored you can look at something on the wall that you haven't seen before.
64. Collecting ugly chairs can be a hobby.
65. Live life to the fullest.
66. This class was the most fun, most entertaining class I've ever had.
67. It is possible to be laid back and productive.
68. Getting burned by red hot metal sucks.
69. Always let the teacher have his way, it's much easier than the student way.
70. Life isn't fair and when you complain about it, it becomes less fair than before.71. Some people are unavoidably intolerable and stupid.
72. All sports have their good and bad seasons.
73. Some people don't get it and never will.
74. Even though The Rock is a fantastic action movie, it's not as good as Terminator 2.
75. Economics tastes good.
76. Lumberjacks are important.
77. How to avoid questions. You can laugh and laugh and then run away and most people will forget to ask again.
78. Buying stuff on eBay is usually better than in the store.
79. All women want is to steal a man's money.
80. Poetry sucks and is boring.81. Every Thursday is lumberjack day.
82. Jennifer Lopez is not hot and that to say so when identifying girls in the "Hot Girls Game" TR will disqualify you if you insist that she is.
83. TR dated the devil.
84. Don't procrastinate.
85. Take care of your responsibilities first.
86. Show up to class on time.
87. If you show that you care about your grade your teacher is more likely to help you out when you're having a hard time.
88. Don't show up to school functions drunk.
89. Don't sweat the little stuff.
90. Sometimes even teachers understand that kids need entertainment in class.91. Kids respect teachers who joke around with them and actually talk to them.
92. Everything you do will have an impact on someone.
93. Be true to yourself.
94. Don't ever ask a guy if he thinks you're fat, there's no right answer and it will just lead to the two of you fighting.
95. Don't be afraid of change.
96. Have fun, no matter what.
97. Cut your losses.
98. Girls have cooties.
99. Family comes first.
100. Don't worry about what other people think. Just live the way you're happy.101. TR has the idea of never getting married and there are pros and cons to this.
102. TR is nicknamed "Mr. Compassionate," but it's a load of crap.
103. When you combine (one student)'s face with Brittney Spear, and (another student) with Christina Aguilera, neither image is a pretty sight, and if they had kids they'd be ugly.
104. Any item costs only as much as people are willing to pay for it.
105. It's important to be smooth with your words, it will get you somewhere in life.
106. TR is pretty good at teaching poetry.
107. If I'm ever fat I'm going to blame TR.
108. If you don't pass TR's class you're stupid, you have to try to fail.
109. People change in two seconds flat.
110. Marriage is a death trap.111. I learned what a metrosexual is, and that I don't want to be one.
112. Some students don't like to be stared at, and if TR knows this he'll make sure everyone stares at you.
113. Bros before hoes, friends always first.
114. Don't focus your life around work.
115. Shit happens.
116. Time goes by fast.
117. Writing more is almost always better than writing less.
118. Poetry and art are stupid. You can become a great artist or poet just by going around and paying people to say good stuff about what you do.
119. English teachers only read the first and last essays of the year.
120. The media sometimes tries to control us.121. If you give kids candy, they will do anything you want.
122. Someone will always be offended by what you say, regardless of what it is.
123. It will always make you feel better if you make fun of someone else, but pick someone who can handle it.
124. Never trust anyone who looks like they live out of a shopping cart.
125. Flannel is not only the greatest fabric, it can make people happy.
126. Invest in the stock market early.
127. TR has mood swings. He can start happy, go into serious and sentimental, and then make everyone afraid, back to happy, all in the space of five minutes. I think it's because he's dating someone, but it might be because he's sad to see us leave.
128. I'm always learning something, even if I don't think I am.
129. High school relationships are a waste of time.
130. Don't try to impress people.131. What goes around comes around.
132. I am smarter than my English teacher.
133. Don't run stop signs, even at school.
134. Don't kill rattlesnakes with a shovel.
135. don't let people change in the back of your car, you can get pulled over for indecent exposure.
136. Don't wear a skirt on windy days.
137. Don't let (student) talk in the microphone when performing at a conecert, he runs his mouth off and says things that piss the crowd off and then everyone hates us.
138. Don't ride your bike through bushes.
139. Modal scales on a guitar.
140. How to work iMovie.141. Candy can be used as a bribe.
142. Conversation skills and defending my opinion.
143. TR is God, but better than that, he taught us how we can convince others we're god as well.
144. Helping others can actually mean helping yourself.
145. TR sometimes made us work hard, but it was always fun.
146. Life will screw you over if you don't screw it over first.
147. Everybody is human. All forms of authority can eventually be broken down to your level. It changes from person to person, but flattery works pretty well for starters.
148. The key to failure is trying to please everyone.
149. You cannot drive over 30 mph on dirt and be in control.
150. Always pay your bills on time.151. Karma exists.
152. If you don't do it today, it won't get done.
153. Whining never works.
154. Drugs are bad, and there are much better, legal alternatives.
155. Everything has a beginning and everything has an end.
156. TR is God and he wants to create a kindergarten army of kids that wear flannel and chop down trees.
157. Never answer the phone. It's probably not that important and if the person on the other end really needs to speak to you they'll send someone to get you.
158. The only good movies are those with nudity and explosions.
159. TR eats babies (I know it).
160. TR, prior to becoming a teacher, lived a colorful life that was turned into a movie called "Red Dawn."161. Don't play poker for shots with a bunch of guys that are bigger than you.
162. Never let your boyfriend and your best friend be alone in a hot tub together, even if you trust them.
163. Men don't know how to have sex until they are at least 20 ... at least that's what I'm told.
164. You'll never get over your first love.
165. There is a time and place where one must learn to shut up.
166. You need to learn to keep friendships and money completely separate.
167. Don't let other people take advantage of you.
168. People are mean, get over it.
169. Don't do something just because everyone else is doing it.
170. Fun is what you make of it.171. If you ask TR for candy, you might get it. If you ask God for candy, you won't.
172. Cutting down trees is good for everyone. Environmentalists have a job (complaining about it), and lumberjacks do too (cutting down the trees).
173. Only make fun of people who are there.
174. (Student) is stupid. We took a poll in class and the poll said so, and polls never lie.
175. TR is selfish. He isn't getting married because his money is his.
176. Crying gets you nothing but a wet shirt.
177. Organization isn't all it's cracked up to be.
178. Purdue is an awesome college.
179. The story of TR's life in movie form is awesome.
180. If you do the work in TR's class, you won't fail.181. You can't have too many chairs.
182. If you can't take an insult, then you're a target in life.
183. Complaining about things also makes you a target.
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lucky wrote
i vote for #57...
that would have increased the amount of fun i had at prom by like a factor of 10. maybe even 11.